Original Song: "Telegraph"

AdamCU81 · Post by **AdamCU81** » Mon Dec 15, 2003 7:16 pm

Here's a song I wrote a while ago. On my site it says the name is "The Next Day" but I changed it to "Telegraph" and I'm too lazy to edit the page. The sound on the recording is a bit flat, but I hope you enjoy it anyways. Comments are appreciated.

http://www.geocities.com/adamcu81/My_Music_Page.html

Oh, and there's also a picture of my awesome dog!

Xoosh · Post by **Xoosh** » Mon Dec 15, 2003 7:22 pm

The song opens up beautifully... i really like your voice, the transition after "red neck guitars" is really neat. the song has a very interesting holiday undertone to it that im really digging. i'd be curious to hear what the main riffs sound like an octave lower.. you should play with that... i think it could add a really sweet beauty sort of idea to the song..

your vocals are a bit too loud for the recording, the falcetto you use around 1:20 is a lil harsh...

definitely sounds like you've been listneing to new Dave Mathews -- get that idea from the 1:30 - 2:15 or so... not bad, but feels a lil too unorriginal... i like it though so make it your own!

the lyrics are solid =) i really like the message... you could definitely use more soul in your guitar... your vocals seem good... the falcetto at 2:30 is really nice...

overall really nice song =) it'd be cool to hear live... but get that lower range of the guitar in there or it's gonna be a little to droning for anyone's ears. =)

check out my stuff if you get a chance, i just posted up something for critique: http://www.dmbtabs.com/boards/viewtopic.php?t=7257

regards,
x

AdamCU81 · Post by **AdamCU81** » Mon Dec 15, 2003 7:33 pm

Thanks for he quick feedback! I totally agree that the vocals are too loud and the song is a bit harsh. It's funny that you mention it sounds like a new Dave song because I wrote this song on or before August 14th....before I heard any new DM, and it was recorded on August 23rd. I think it's Dave that needs to get a little original....copycat...hehe And I definately think the song is better live, and with old guitar strings which mellow it out a bit. I'll give your stuff a listen right now. Thanks again!

Oh, and I know the site is down right now....I think only a few people can listen before bandwith limits are exceded.

Xoosh · Post by **Xoosh** » Mon Dec 15, 2003 7:36 pm

hehe what's funny is that i like what you do lyrically with your voice and guitar on that part more then when dave does it

funny

/x

AdamCU81 · Post by **AdamCU81** » Mon Dec 15, 2003 7:48 pm

Damn....I don't know if you should go that far!

but thanks!

DustyDave · Post by **DustyDave** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 9:40 am

Damn Adam i love this , very great voice and guitar and lyrics , the opening is amazing , really got me hooked from the very beginning

Awesome work , keep it up

geekmug · Post by **geekmug** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 11:24 am

I dunno.. maybe it's just me, but the dissosance gets old after a while.. sorry

I think fatjack won't mind if I do the honor..

7/10

AdamCU81 · Post by **AdamCU81** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 5:58 pm

Thanks for the feedback Dusty and Geek.

DustyDave · Post by **DustyDave** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 6:01 pm

You're very welcome Adam

MyHeartIsYours813 · Post by **MyHeartIsYours813** » Sat Dec 20, 2003 11:53 pm

Dude, Adam this kicks ass!!! You're one talented dude...yeah does sound a lot like new Dave stuff, but damn, who cares, still freakin awesome!!!
I'm putting this on my next CD mix to listen to before bed dude lol, great stuff.

AdamCU81 · Post by **AdamCU81** » Wed Dec 24, 2003 3:39 am

thank you for the kind words!