I wasn't going to post any more originals but Sand Song only got 9 replies and 2 of them were me So I'm putting one more up.
Before you listen, I already know...WAY too long. It's like 7 min long. I have a problem. But my question is how do you shorten a song like this? 2 verses, 1 bridge, 3 choruses. Pretty standard. I don't know, it's hard. Anyway, simple little song, called Emptiness. If you need lyrics let me know.
you are very professional with your music. I like this one. Your vocal needs to stand more, so just adjust your volume. This type of song is good too if you have a band to back you up... i dont know if you have that available to you in iraq, but i think it would sound cool.
I do like this song, but i think it gets repetitive after a while.. like after 3:30. well done.
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Put on some heavy strings and Jam the night away.
The KMT
more good work, the vocals need to come through more and it would be cool if you added a lead guitar track so its not so repetitve, good luck in charlotte
wow. this is really good. as someone else said, i think the recording could have the volume of the vocals up a bit. you have a nice voice.
good work man.
"Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius -- and a lot of courage -- to move in the opposite direction." -- Albert Einstein
Great voice, great melody, great rhythm, great structure. I'm very impressed.
I would get rid of the second chorus and go into the bridge from there. I would also change up the bridge. It should be noticeably different than the rest of the song. Maybe try changing keys.
Awesome song. Why were you going to stop posting originals? You stupid or something?
Very impressive, I didn't listen to the lyics because they were a little soft, but I like the guitar part a lot. Did you record this in IraQ? I think when you get back you should try and record a better/cleaner remake. A++
PS: I know what you mean by too long, I do the same thing. I can play the same riff over and over singing with it just to hear the music. It's awsome.
thanks everyone. i really apprecate the comments. i'll try that shortening MWR and i'll look about changing keys.
elliot - I did record this in iraq in a microphone of one of those telephone headsets. when i get home i'm going to find a better set up where i can mic my guitar and feed it in through the pickup to my computer, and i'm going to get a better mic for home recordings.
great song man, i love this forum too, we need more people to review stuff, but i really enjoyed the song, and the vocals were good. best of luck with the band in charlotte
i wish i could play and sing at the same time, i need to start practicing that i guess
Man mitch i love your covers, your a very talented writer and you have a really decent voice... I enjoyed it a lot and i listened to it like 3 times in a row
My only critique is basically what everyone else says about the volume of your voice and the length of it..a minute or 2 shorter maybe, but its an excellent song man nonetheless, great job and keep it up!!
Appsoldier wrote:thanks everyone. i really apprecate the comments. i'll try that shortening MWR and i'll look about changing keys.
elliot - I did record this in iraq in a microphone of one of those telephone headsets. when i get home i'm going to find a better set up where i can mic my guitar and feed it in through the pickup to my computer, and i'm going to get a better mic for home recordings.
So I'm putting one more up. 
